Acquired in November, untypical choice- rush choice- incited by a typical eagerness to fill the void left by a typically passionate story with a tragically predictably written ending.
845 Printed Pages.
(Book Kept on the Night Stand)
M.E. 562012 22:45
Day Six- You
-Alone; Doing My Hair in front of that Desecrate Mirror which our likenesses occasionally occupy together.
- The Product of an act caused by your hand comes to light. Slight and Meaningless to you, but to me brings forth the fact that your Love isn’t mine to hold.
-Tears. Why’s. How’s. Screams.
-..In that moment I realize the reason I was Fixing my hair in that Desecrate Mirror to begin with.
- Neither my Love Does He Hold
_M.E. 562012 13:17
“Product of my Imagination- Collection III”
Allow me to Fall from Great Heights
as a matter of fact- Push Me.
During the Free Fall I will close my eyes and focus on the rapid beating of my Heart
Endorphins will Release in to my Blood Stream
Blood would quickly divert from my stomach to my muscles.
Euphoria.
I will feel no Fear until the moment my eyes open.
I will Think, Analyze, and Attempt to Solve.
Panic.
Pitch Black Then, Pitch Black Now.
M.E. 2/27/12 3:44pm
Title: HURT
December 17th 2009
3:53am
Even though they are just a Product of my Imagination, I can’t ignore the obvious parallels.
Poem 1:
Her smile paints the picture of happiness
Her arms supply him with warmth and security
Her fingers provide the caress he desires
In her smile: She hides the delight in his leaving
In her arms: She holds whom he believes to be his child
In Her Fingers: She clutches the Key to his heart, waiting to throw it out
He can look his woman straight into her lovely face
and she can play along like everything is okay
I’ve worked so hard to protect the ones I care about, especially the ones I Love with lies, and secrets. Regardless of how minor they may have been, maybe my own heart was what I’ve been trying to save from harm this whole time, maybe it was my own self interest. I undoubtedly have the ability to sit here and tell you what you want to hear, and even though you may want to believe me, the ones you love can still look into your face and see the truth. I sincerely had what I thought to be your best intentions at heart.
Poem 2:
A faint wind enters my room, bypassing the blood red curtains that covered my window
A gust of wind enters my room with no concern for the blood red curtains that covered my window
The curtain continued to flow
Silence, Stillness, Peace…
Immediately Followed by…
Chaos, Darkness, Despair…
A Shadow appeared from my window
His dark arms clinched my throat, my breathing was compromised
His dark deep voice spoke to me, my mind went blank
I lay helplessly, speechless.
I woke.
I never knew what this Dark Shadow represented in my dream, I may never know. My speculation: The hurt I have caused, and even the hurt that has been done to me. The reason why I stay up at night, the reason why I feel helpless, the reason why I am speechless.
